Graduation?

Last month when Lila turned three I was shocked by the realization that my babies are growing up much too fast. Today marks Emily's 19 month birthday. Wow! Is it possible that much time has flown by since she entered this world and captured my heart? It amazes me. SHE amazes me. During her NICU stay I would stand over her isolet and pray a verse from Proverbs over and over again, " Dearest Lord, Give our little Emily victory and be her shield. Guard her course and protect her way." It has been a long course through many ups and downs, but I am convinced that God has been her shield and He has kept her under His protective wing. One of Emily's nurses told me a long time ago that little ones never really graduate from being premature. It can feel like hurdle after hurdle without the finish line in sight as their tiny bodies were forced to adjust to this world before they were fully ready. We've had our hurdles and I thought I saw that finish line but it seems we were just rounding another bend. I know the one who watches over Emily is still guarding her course and protecting her way but there are still more hurdles to jump just the same and as her mommy, I'm getting tired of jumping!

It's now October, RSV season has rolled around again. Emily has been recommended again for synagis injections this year, which we were not expecting, but both her pedi. and pulmonologist think it is better to be safe than sorry when Emily is concerned. Her brain bleed at birth, off the chart head circumference and the recent scare with hydrocephalus have her pegged as "at risk." Wayne and I still haven't decided what to do about the shots because they are so expensive and do not guarantee the child will not contact RSV even with the synagis booster. Insurance of course is being difficult about coverage due to this being Emily's second RSV season. So, for now we are being careful, avoiding germy breeding grounds and washing our hands a lot. As the winter picks up and RSV hits our area we might hibernate just a bit more to be extra careful.

The other hurdle has to do with Emily's broken tibia and fibula back in June. X-rays show that the bones have still not fully healed and other fractures were detected that sent up red flags. She had a bone density scan and the results were not favorable. A bone biopsy was recommended but after hearing the risks involved, and knowing that the results could still leave us without a diagnosis, I opted out of that test. So again, we were told to be careful, cautious parents and not to hover but to keep a watchful eye for bad falls, unnecessary roughness etc. Hopefully after some added meds and extra vitamin D her scans will reveal strong healthy bones! I try really hard not to be paranoid, but at times it is hard to just let her be a 19 month old that stumbles and falls. I know she will be fine. This is just one hurdle closer to that finish line. One step closer to that preemie graduation we long for! Thanks, as always, for keeping her in your prayers!